嗨，2013

是的，现在是080120123,11.44pm。
我是写迟了啊。
没法子，我之前一直在忙我的考试。
两天考4张全卷子，我真的觉得我太好运了。
coursemate 里只有我一个中头奖。><

好啦，不废话了。

老套的说一句，新年快乐。

刚刚看回去，我一年前写的目标。
还好，我到达了80%.
剩下的，还在努力地阶段。

现在要简单的写写我的目标啦。

1.我要花多点时间在家人和朋友身上。
   我希望我可以有多点时间陪我的家人。太多事情发生了，我真的不知道下一秒会发生什么事  情，家人永远是我最优先的考虑。我记得DA，rahat，跟我说过，我的value是，Family, Friend and love!:)自己本身觉得很对！我的朋友，我真的觉得我需要个你们更多的时间，我很想跟你们去泰国玩啦。><

2.GCDP
今年我希望我去的成。这是我的梦，也是我要做的事。我要去感受为什么每个人要去了再去。

3.旅行
我的韩国之旅，我会玩得很疯狂，倒数20天。也因为这个旅行，我破产了。是时候，想办法，找钱了。><

4.五月天
我和我的好朋友会一起去五月天的演唱会，票买了。:) 很疯狂的决定。 因为我没去过，敢敢去啦!：）

5.我要我的成绩变得更好
接下来的sem，几乎应该痛不欲生。paper重到不像话。只求能顺利毕业，成绩进步。

6.AIESEC journey
我要完成我所有在@的梦和要做的事，在我决定停下来前。

7.我要学着释放自己。
我希望我可以真的在适当的时候把自己释放出来，不要憋着。

8.摄影。梦
很喜欢拍照，很想学，很想有一架好点的相机。><
我要赚钱！:)


2013，愿是个好年！:)

你

听着熬夜，和他在聊天。

脑海浮现着我们的曾经，我的嘴角上扬。

天啊，我好想回去。

本以为我不会放下。

本以为我会很恨他。

本以为我不知道该怎样继续和他做朋友。

而现在，

我很期待他回来。

我很期待和他碰面。

我很期待我跟他面对面聊天。

我很想念他。

原来，我跟他真的是注定做一辈子的好朋友。

好多时候，我走不下去了，我还没告诉他。

他就会先来鼓励我。

看着他的留言，我会很感动。

怎么办，对他是戒不掉了。

不知道以后会怎样，至少你还有我，我还有你。

我们不寂寞。

我很想念你。

一辈子的好朋友，我爱你。

121212

我来啦。

心情是很不好的。

真的 很 累。

不 是 开 玩 笑 的 累。

刚结束了一个interview。

谢谢自己的坚强，至少我没有掉泪。

虽然在里面已经快要掉泪了。

不要问我为什么要哭，我答不出来， 眼泪不听话，我没法子。

通过这件事，我才知道谁才是一直站在我旁边support我。

谢谢那一封短短的简讯，我温暖了。

也许，当下我要的就是这个。

好像好像离开。

有多久，我已经不是我了。

我想离开。

离开这烦人的一切。

我想找回单纯的快乐。

Breath

Yes, this is quite a long time for me didn't write something over here.

I am busy with AIESEC stuff and study.

Today, finally I feel like want write something over here.

A place that can make me breath.

I need a break, take a breath.

I just receive many news in today.

My interns is finally want to continue the project and I know I am going to start a very tough journey.

My MC VP is resigned due to visa problem.

My team is happened something seriously and until now I just know.

Not going to talk the interns problem as I not really clear with what happened .

I don't want comment anything before I know the whole story.

For the second  and third issues, I am kinda sad.

Minerva, MC VP PM , my big boss, she is resigned from her position due to visa problem.

Just now before I back to UUM, I checked my FB , I shocked when I read the post from her.

Minerva, all the best and have a bright future ahead! I will miss u.

My team has 4 people.

4 different type of people.

We argued a lot, we disagree with each others opinion.

We laughed, we degil, we care but we not really show out.

And now, the things is happened.

I am so scare to lose anyone of them.

Don't give up, We gonna pass through it together.

You still have us that always support you.

No doubt, I am tired.

I am tired with this kind of life.

I scare I lost and demotivated.

My OC team is my responsibility but they not really give me full commitment.

I wonder is it my problem, my leadership problem?

Half year left, can I pass through all this and achieve what I want?

I want to achieve what I want but the process is so hard and tired.

03102012

终于，我抽得出一些些时间来写一写。

我努力生活的很好。

我真的很忙。

课业越来越繁重，(谢谢Edmund的书）.

AIESEC的活动真的把我的时间塞得满满。

RD, Introduction day, Interview, Induction Day.

可是自己是很enjoy在每个活动里。

希望我可以继续酱子。

朋友的关心，窝心。

真的觉得自己累坏了。

满脑子想着想离开这里。

我想要一个旅行。

在我还没面对更大的压力前。

我很想好好爱已经累坏的自己。

酷我音乐盒在播这梁静茹的爱久见人心。

心颤抖得不行。

很真的歌词，很贴近自己的歌词。

一个晚上下来，我听的歌，都是有故事的歌。

有时候真的还蛮讨厌自己喜欢重感情。

因为喜欢一样事物，所以不轻易放弃。

曾经我和他喜欢的歌是几乎一样的。

现在，那些歌在我的酷我音乐盒里，一遍遍的播着。

习惯了？

马木了？

不了!:(

有些时候，还是会想起那些时候。

Crush 这首歌是我现在在听回去，自己也会怕的一首歌。

这首歌有着我跟他最深的回忆。

我很怕我以后我不知道怎样面对他。

矛盾吧？

很想要一个拥抱，然后让我痛痛快快的哭吧！

Whatsapps 好像不会因为你而响了。

你真的就只能这样吗？

爸爸妈妈

刚才和妈妈讲电话的时候，眼泪真的眼睛里打转。

天啊，我真的好像他们。

当下，好想抱抱我的妈妈，我的爸爸。

妈妈也太可爱了。

她跟我说，我在FB，可是我不会玩。

我看到你的照片。

当下觉得妈妈很可爱，很窝心。

是的，妈妈好像很不好意思的跟我说对不起。

对不起，不能带我一起去日本旅行。

我真的不介意，我明白家里的状况。

我不会勉强。

不要觉得对不起我，好吗？

我的一个小小愿望是和妈妈一起去旅行。

爸爸是个不爱旅行的人，所以没办法啦。

是不是越大想的东西越多？

我真的很怕我没有那个机会。

不能去旅行，不要紧。

只想呆在你们的身边。

我不知道我今天是怎样。

我真的很想家。

我真的不敢想象有一天如果我失去他们，我会怎样？

我真的很怕。

他们是我一辈子想守护的人。

同时，也跟妈妈说明了，明年我一定会去Exchange了。

妈妈没意见，叫我问爸爸。

她说爸爸ok，她也ok。

爸爸就在妈妈旁边，我听到他说回来再讲。

exchange，明年是去定了。

船到前头自然直。:)

挂电话前的对话，

我："妈妈，我爱你，帮我跟爸爸讲我也爱他。早点睡，晚安。我想你们！"

妈妈：“爸爸，你女儿讲她爱你，你爱她吗？”

爸爸："她真的这样讲？叫她早点睡，我等她回家！"

天啊，听到这个，这个人就快哭了。

当下真的好想冲回家。

抱抱他们。

谢谢上天让他们是我的爸爸妈妈。

一辈子的爱人，我爱你们。

今夜，想你们了。

他

开学一个礼拜了，终于有写blog的feel了。

今天和朋友去了changloon转了一圈，想了好多东西。

回来时开fb，看到一个很窝心的留言更加想谢谢。

今夜，我想起他。

曾经带给我很多回忆的他。

我想起了曾经我们有多快乐。

我很想让我们保持这种原有的快乐。

可是，好像不行了。

有些时候，当你知道太多东西，未必是件好事。

而我好像就是这样。

有苦难言。

我很想找个人讲讲我的感受和心情。

其实，有时收久了，很辛苦。

而我，已经不懂得如何去相信一个人了。

我不知道我该怎样的态度和立场来面对他。

我自己觉得我没有对他坦白我现在的状况。

他不明白我的心情。

他不知道。

可是知道了又能怎样？

事情不会改变。

我很讨厌whatsapp。

我讨厌对方明明收到短信了，却不回你。

这会让我很气馁和灰心。

我放低我的身份了，现在还想怎样？

我的忍耐是有限的。

你可以说我狠吧?!

当我受伤了，我可以马上离开。

这次，我带着自己的伤口留在原地，因为什么？

因为是他。

我很矛盾吧？

像个白痴似的。

老实说，我真的很想离开。

他自己心里有数，也知道这个可能性很大。

只是现在，我宁可自己受伤，我也还想保护他。

真的觉得自己很笨。

我真的怀疑我前世是不是欠了他，这辈子来讨债的?!

很开心开学了。

把自己投入在很忙的环境中。

忙碌让我忘记了不开心的事情。

很开心，在我的大学里，

还是有些人会默默地关心我。

也许自己不擅长分享，隐瞒自己情绪。

知道这是不好的，可是改不了。

真的不想大家为我担心。

我还是会好好的。

日子还是要过。

我会笑容大大的过每天的过我的生活。

也许前半段的文章，你看不懂我在写些什么。

不重要，重要的是我想说，我很好。

简单来说，让我重新认识他吧！

有時候，一種關心多了就會忘了感動，
是否，一份體貼久了也會忘了感覺，
為何，一顆心靠的近了卻忘了珍惜。
如果有一天我們變陌生了，那麼我就重新認識你。

我很好

突如其来的袭击，我受不了。

我慌了，我的世界乱了。

把我的部落关了。

我快疯了当我看到熟悉的名字出现在页面。

心痛的不得了。

又羞又怒。

感觉自己的世界被侵犯了。

我需要一个可以让我把我想说都说出来的地方和世界。

我想你应该很难明白那种心情。

当你开会部落，心种的那种颤抖,

当你听回同一首歌，脑海里浮现的画面。

当你看回去自己写的文章，心里觉得自己好笨。

有冲动想把这个部落给删了。

可是，这里有太多回忆了。

下不了手。

快疯掉了。

回忆猖狂的浮现在我的脑海。

那些年，那些日子，那些属于我和你的小事。

我很努力的做工，我很努力地把自己弄到很忙。

我真的很感恩，我遇到了我的同事们。

陪我走过这难过的一个多礼拜。

与他们吵吵闹闹的日子真的好过很多。

体会我，谅解我，开导我，关心我。

家里的人是很担心。

对不起，我说不出怎么了。

别担心了，我没事。

老天爷给我的考验只是比别人多了一些些。

我还撑的住。

想说，我真的没事了。

别问发生什么事，我想说我会说。

所有的事都会过去的。

想对自己是说，

不错嘛，这次这么快就可以没事了。

别再那么笨了。

你值得更好的。

最后想说，我还是会守护我想守护的人。

雨过会天晴的。

Life isn't about waiting the storm to pass,it's about learning to dance in the rain.

Annoy

It is really annoying when my family members keep asking me why you emo.

I know they care and concern me.

But then, please let me alone.

I will be ok after sometime.

I hate and dislike people who ask me this kind of question in front so many peoples.

If you want ask, please ask me privately.

I will feel comfortable.

Don't know why, I feel so insecure now.

I feel like I have no more private place for me to voice out my mind.

My facebook friends list have my almost my family members inside.

Once i post emo status, for sure,the next day,when having meal together,

 they will ask why you emo?

come share with me, we are your listener!

Please la,dont do this again.

I feel annoying.

I din say much because I understand and respect you all.

But please respect me.

My stuff, I can handle myself.

Everyone have their own stuff and sad things.

If I am going to share, I will tell and share.

If I am not going to do so, please dont force me.

Be frank, it is not funny when you all asking me why I am down in the big crowd.

You all seems like not well know me.

Just let me alone sometime and I will be ok.

I can share with you all afterwards but not now.

I am hurt when you guys do so.

I have a thought,  I want remove you all from my friends list.

It is too annoy!

Please dont burden me now.

I need to tidy up many stuff now.

What I need is your support.

Just stand by me as usual .

Dont ask and dont too worry.

I am really ok now.

Please believe me I can settle all the things.

:(

是哭了。

伤心了。

第二次一样的事还是发生了。

最担心的最害怕的还是发生了。

突然觉得自己的人生好好笑。

为什么我会这个样子？

自己真的好笨。

让自己因为同样的东西，受伤两次。

真的不是开玩笑的痛。

我不能一副有事情的样子。

在家人朋友面前还是得嘻嘻哈哈。

面具不得不带。

原谅我，我不希望他人为我担心。

我想自己慢慢的复原。

有一天会没事的。

我讨厌老天爷给我的玩笑。

这个玩笑开不起。

第二次了。

真的累了。

也觉得自己笨了。

梦醒了。

真的痛了。

该抽离了。

HARLO!:D

Alright, 10 days no update for this blog.

Is time for me to write something over here.

As I promised, I will update something about me recently.

1st of all, I am working now,is a part time promoter.

Everyday fold shirts and pants.

* I guess I will be a good house wife in the future! I am well train now!*=D

Everyday chit chat  with the colleagues over there.

They teach me a lot.

They are caring and lovely!:)

One of them, I called him as my DiDi!:)

Actually he is elder than me,now waiting for his master course in USM.

I met him on 3 years ago and now we met again.

Feel so happy about it!:))

He is the one who really teach me a lot.

He shared and he is caring.

Awesome senior!:)

How lucky am I can meet him!:)

Keep contact and all the best!:)

My last day of job is 27th and will work for one more day on 31st!:))

Well, beside this, I am also busy with the @ stuff!:)

Many things need plan and think!://

It is not easy be a leader.

But is worth to learn.

Believe in my choice and enjoy my choice.:)

I wish I can have more interns to interview ar!:)

God bless me !*cross finger*=)

He went to Singapore work le.:)

All the best, dear!:))

I will redeem my starsbuck from you!=p

Please take a very good care there.

Gotta miss you a lot!=(

Meet you after half year!

love you!:)

Alright, I think that is all laaaaaaaaaaa!:)))

Tuan tuan dan puan puan, puas hatiiii?:)

10082012

It is weird .

Really weird.

I dunnoe why I am having this kind of feeling right now.

Jealous, worry.

Damn you.

What happened actually?

No idea!:(

Just keep worry!

I hate myself.
 I know I cant do like this.
I have no stand to do so.
You just keep make me worry you.
Is not funny!:(

I am tired with this.
Can you stop this kind of games?:((

I just wish i can get a hug right now.
I am not good at all.
I wish to have a hug.

I feel suck!:(

You better rpl my msg or find me once u back!:(

Thank You

Thank you for willing to lend me a hand when I need.

You not even ask why and just yes.

I am glad touch that you are so believe me.

I love u!:)

Touch.

I believe and I bet,

In this world, 

I can't find the second person like you.:)

Thanks for everything.

Happiness

A very short update here.

Yes ,my holiday is great over here!:))

I will write more and post the picture on next week!

Tomorrow I will heading to Shah Alam for 30 hours Famine.

My 1st time ever!

God bless me , everything please go smooth!

Now is already August!

One more month, I need go back to UUM!

is too fast la!><

Yes, he is successfully to get a job in Singapore!

Congratulation, dear!:)

Dunnoe what will be happen in the future, all the best to u.

Please always open ur whatsapp and facebook!

Keep contact, ok?

I think Imma seriously going to miss u!:(

Fighting together, and we will meet soon!:)

I am waiting to travel together!:))

I feel happiness is around me!:D

24/07/2012

Recently,

Imma is just keep busy with AIESEC stuff.

It is really not kidding. 

I have tone of stuff need to settle.

I feel tired and pressure!><

What kind of the holiday I have?

Even he also ask me, why your holiday is so busy?!@@

Busy life is happening now.

Sometime, I just feel like want run away from here to go somewhere else to have a short break.

I want go to somewhere else ,go to relax.

Emmm, should really go to plan it before new sem start!:)

I feel you are far from me.

I am worry.

I scare I will lost you.:(

You mean a lot to me.

Insecure.

Worried.

有客至远方来:)

终于啊，我甘愿在这里写写了。

哈哈哈，是忙也懒惰了。=/

我还没打工可是我不明白为什么我好像也很忙。@@

20/07/2012

很开心的一天啊。:)

和Desmond一起带台湾的 AIESECer， Eric 去槟城一日游。

真的很好玩，也很累。

前一天，去看半夜场的spiderman.

第二天七早八早要出门了，带他去走了姓周桥，看壁画，极乐寺，吃著名的小食。

还有，晚上玩完了还去看Batman.

Batman很夸张，整个Island买不到票.

我们回去Pacific买票，幸运地是还有票。

这部戏2.5个小时，是不错看的。

可是，desmond和我真的累坏了。

在前半部戏，真的有睡去。=.=

Eric真的很精神和很感兴趣的在看。

Eric一直在说大马看戏很夸张的便宜，台湾看戏要台币220元。

而且椅子和环境不像这里的那么好。

Eric一直叫我过去台湾GCDP。

朋友，我也想啊。:)

希望我明年能达成啊，明年。

去得成，我一定要把整个台湾都玩完啦。

Eric，到时记得带我去玩。

我要去东华大学，我要去看那个湖！！:D

我要去认识那边的AIESECers。

台湾的AIESECer跟我们真的很不一样。:)

Eric，台湾见！:)

很高兴认识你！:)

也因为连续带他去玩了两天，也夜归了两个晚上，本小姐被禁足了。

老妈生气了，因为我让她担心了。

对不起嘛，又不是故意的.:)

再来，

同一天，

我知道我过了prolong stage。

松了一口气也觉得责任更加大。

只想在有限的时间把我能做的全部都做好。

不知道自己可以去到多远，只能很踏实的把每一步都走好。

享受整个过程，不要抱怨。

我相信我可以。

最后，给现在飞机上的你，

一路顺风啊。

去台湾唱出的属于你青春的诗歌吧。

回来，唱给我听。

你可以的。

珍重。

:)

It is weird.

I don't know why I am so care on one person .

I care him. 

I admit he means a lot to me.

He will be at another country in few more minutes!

Although now he is just go for travel , I feel sucks!

But few weeks later, he is most probably will work over there!

Emm, I am wondering how am going to contact with him!

Nah, dont say me bad la!:)
Safe flight!:)

Many peoples are wondering what is our relationship?

I also not clear but I will say that I like the status between you and me now.

Is comfortable and safe.=)

You make me addicted , and please responsible on it!:p

Promise, always whatsapp me dont matter where you are,kays?:)

IMY

You are the poison of me!:)

5 more days

Finally, I am able to have sometime to write something here after NatCon2012.
I think now I am not going to write about NatCon 2012 but is something about LCPM and my feeling now.

Just now, open facebook.
I saw there in the group post about the arranging for the interview slot.
I scare and I realize now is  15/7/2012.

15/7/2012, this date means what to you?
It definitely means a lot to me.
5 more days, I will have my second interview for my prolong stage.
5 more days for me to prove I am capable and suitable to be part of the team.
5 more days for me to do whatever I wish to do before it is too late.
5 more days, either stay or leave.
5 more days, maybe I no longer in the team.
5 more days, maybe I am the real PD.
5 more days, everything will settle down.

I feel torture now.
No doubt, I feel our team now is bond well and everyone start to know each others more.
And too bad,  5 more days, we need face again.
Leave or stay.
Honestly, I am not willing to leave this team.
I am falling in love with team.
I believe we can do something together.
It is too EARLY to say leave.
I wish to do more things and enjoy the moment with the
I wish to go DA in Penang.
I feel that that is a awesome session, but the rules is u must part of MT.

I love my job now.
I find the way to carry out my job.
I know why am I here and why my team form like this.
But everything maybe will become nothing after 5 more days.


In LCPM, everyone cried badly.
We know each others more.
We listen everyone's story.
We understand their feelings.
We plan hard and play hard!
We just like a big family.
Everyone take care each others.
I just love the feelings.

Will I continue in the team after 5 days?

Honestly I have no ideas!:(

I scare and no dare to think.


The road is not easy but I'm willing to continue it.

26062012

Yes,Imma officially end my SEM 2!

I have no idea how am I finished my SEM 2.

All the exam prepared in the last minute.-.-

I think few of the papers I may be will retake. OMO!@@

God ,please bless me can pass all then will do!

But, don't care, now is HOLIDAY!:)

Turn on the party and holiday mood!:)

I think it will be very busy for me in this few days.

Heading to KL for LEAD conference, NatCon.

I told myself I need to enjoy till maximum!:)

I am ready for that!:)

What I concern is after 12/7,what am i going to do?

Emm, perhaps have any job recommend?

Seriously I need a job to sustain myself!:)

If u have any job to intro, kindly leave a msg here! 

Thanks in advanced!:)

Something to share, 

I am very happy cause I think I did a well job to my leader.

I am happy when I read the email from him.:)

Just very sorry, I cant send it on time for the personal problem.

It is happened to sudden and I cant solve it immediately and drag the others things.

Try to avoid for next time.

Some words to you.

Dear you,

Just be brave in any situation.

You are better than you think.

Be confident on yourself.

You are great.

I will be here at any time.

Inbox me in fb if you need me.

For sure, I will miss you.

Take good care and all the best.

Have a safe trip!:)

Enjoy till maximum yea.

Believe me, nothing to fear.

Just go ahead as you are YOUNG!:)

Last for not least,
To you:
Congratulation.:)
U did a well job and I shall say see you in NatCon or LEAD?
Hahahah!:)
Remind me if you want borrow books from me, kays?
Somehow. I feel like that recently we din talk much?!:)
LOL!

Let See!

And now, I get the answer why I am in the prolong stage.

It is just kinda hurt when I know the reason.

I am wonder what is the measurement tools for the word commitment?

I am not ready?

Let  see for this coming one month.

Challenge accepted.:)